The Month of May was such an interesting month for me. It felt like it just passed by and I keep trying to remind myself of what actually happened. What did I do in May? What did I learn? I almost didn’t write a blog post. I kept thinking to myself, what would be a good topic to discuss and/or what should I talk about? Skincare seemed like a great idea initially but once I started writing the blog post, I discovered I have so much to say about my skincare journey and the things I have learnt along the process so I decided to scratch that. It’s way better off as a video. So back to square one. I put my thinking hat back on but nothing was coming to me, and just as I was about to take the thinking hat off and watch some Korean drama, I remembered my goal for this year about blogging once a month. I felt bad and kinda guilty. I guess the pain/fear of not meeting my blogging goals for the month motivated me into action. To be quite frank, I still don’t know what this blog post is going to be about but I thought I should write how I feel, the thoughts that ran through my mind this month and hopefully I find some clarity on what to do.
So many things...
May was a month full of new ideas on things to do. I have ideas written down everywhere, literally. I want to blog, do youtube (idk what to post on there yet), write an ebook, grow my IG page, grow the traffic to my blog, start a new styling series (idk whether IG or Youtube will be a good platform for this), get a paid sponsorship, grow as a photographer, create a portfolio with my pictures, create my media kit, and keep learning all the things I need to know to be successful as a content creator. THIS GIRL HAS A LOT SHE WANTS TO DO! Deep breaths Wendy, deep breaths. I feel a bit all over the place, anxiety and nervousness breathing down my neck. I don’t know what to do first. That’s not even the worst part. I start one thing and I finish it half way because I am jumping on to another thing that I have to do. At this point idk if I will ever be able to do any of these things – jack of all trades, master of none. It’s kinda understandable when we go through these emotional waves but it shouldn’t prevent us from doing. Find something that can slow your heart rate down, a pause, or time out might prove useful as well. Whatever that can help you persevere so you can plan accordingly.
One thing that has kept me afloat throughout is just learning how to listen to my body and my mood. When I don’t feel inspired I don’t work, I try to use the time to learn, that’s if I know I will absorb the information I am learning. Other times I just sleep or watch a show to refresh my mind. I have learnt that I tend to be a perfectionist and to avoid me feeling bad or beating myself up, I have started being intentional about how I get things done. My peace of mind has been a priority to me these days.
“My peace of mind has been a priority to me these days.”
Light @ the end of the tunnel
Looking on the bright side, I have started my Media kit. I haven’t finished yet, so I can’t check it off my to do list but I have at the very least started it. I have a youtube account even though idk for sure what I want to do with it. I know what content I want for my ebooks, it’s just a matter of writing and knowing the right time to publish. My IG page has been growing. I won’t lie, it’s aaaaallllooootttt of work like OMG! I am seeing the fruit of my hard work daily. I have bought the materials I need to study and started them already. I found out that the best way for the material I learn to stick, is to implement as I learn, so I do an hour and implement what I have learnt until I get used to doing it. I know what my new styling series is going to be about but my only concern is the execution (I worry if the result will come out the way I envisioned it). Guys I know we live in a result based society but let’s try and also celebrate the method/process as well. It will help give you the drive you need when anxiety about results step in. With regards to my portfolio and growth as a photographer, I need to be more intentional about this by taking more pictures with my camera. I am more comfortable taking pictures with my phone to be honest, I don’t know why my camera intimidates me, well I think I know why, it ties back to my learning method, I have learnt how to shoot on manual but never implemented it. So I need to get out of my comfort zone and shoot in manual mode for my portfolio and edit those pictures. Talking about edits, I really want to create presets because I love editing pictures and want to help you guys get your desired result. I know that to get paid sponsorship I need to keep growing, doing what I am doing and God will bless me with the right paid partnership. I also need to shoot my shot by pitching and see what happens.
“We shouldn’t let our fears and worries prevent us from doing.”
Look beyond your worry
In the process of writing out all the things I have achieved so far, I feel a bit better about myself. I am making progress, I am growing and making an impact and everything I want to do will be executed! Thanks guys for reading this post, hopefully it encourages someone out there who might also be in a limbo. I realized while writing this blog post that we should all look deeper and encourage ourselves. We should draw strength from within. We shouldn’t let our fears and worries prevent us from doing. Sometimes the path we choose to take in life can be lonely and tedious but never give up hope because the God who has put those ideas in your heart will help you manifest them. To do or not to do? Whatever choice you make, depending on the situation, could have a significant impact on your life.
Till next time.